Almost 4 months old!

Lydia in purple (my favorite)

A night out!

Drew and I haven't ventured out much without Lydia, but the other night we decided to give it a try. Drew had a business function in Greeley, (yeah, I know, that is far for the first venture). I had two babysitters come over so that it wouldn't be too overwhelming if Lydia had an episode. That is what I call her long stretches of crying. She did have one while we were gone, but the girls handled it well and were able to calm her after a while and get her to sleep. We are trying a new medicine next week and are hoping for even more improvement. She has improved over the past 3 weeks. Small Blessings! So I am praying that as she gets older (she will be 4 months in a week) she will continue to get better. So below is a picture of Drew and I (the first one in a while) at our Greeley event. We heard a leading epidemiologist in the country. He explained the myths that have been circulated against vaccines, their origins, and the facts from scientific research. It was great information to have. It was especially interesting to see how the media can get a piece of information and totally twist, stretch, and fabricate the truth. I am completely for vaccines because my husband has led me to read and research all the information that is out there on the issue. But I know several people that have concerns about vaccines because of a lot of circulated fabrications that present as truth in science. It is a BIG issue and one that deserves a lot of time researching. So what I learned from this speaker was to do just that-research, check the source, and don't just hear and believe. He also presented a lot of recent data on outbreaks of preventable diseases and deaths-which brings the harsh reality to the issue. Overall, the evening was great--I got to spend time with my wonderful husband in the car ride to and from -talking without interruption ( I would have to say that was the best part).

Our evening out!

Better days ahead!

After a couple rants, I am feeling better and I think Lydia is too. As I said Sunday she had the best day she had had in a long while, maybe ever (as i can remember anyway-the last 3 months are blurry). But yesterday and today she has also been doing a little better. She definitely has not been crying as much and I am able to get adequate amounts of food in her. I forgot to mention that I started her on a protein sensitive, colic formula to see if she was being aggravated by something maybe she was allergic to. It is the closest thing to pre-digested formula and that may really be helping as well. The bad part is, it is twice as expensive as the expensive formula she was on. However, I still think reflux is a big issue b/c when I breastfed for 2 1/2 months the feedings were the same experience-which was what led me to pump exclusively and then stop completely (which was heartbreaking for me). So the combination of the formula and the medicine may be helping. I have been praying for that excessively, because I know little Lydia is just waiting to BLOOM into her little bubbly joyful self, she just needs to the pain to ease. I know it will!

Test Results

Well, I was very disappointed in the GI scan. My pediatrician made it sound like it was going to be a measure somewhat of the reflux that Lydia might be having; otherwise I wouldn't have wasted a lot of money to do it (b/c my insurance probably won't cover this procedure). I would not have minded putting Lydia through that or the money if it would have been more comprehensive in a sense.

So we get there and wait a while to get back there with a starving Lydia on our hands, b/c she could not eat 4 hours prior to the appt. and I tried to get her to eat at 3 am but to no avail so it had been a while. Then when we do get back there, the lady tech says to me "well she doesn't look underweight, why are you here?" I looked at her like uhhh, Lydia's dr. sent her. (you can't get a procedure like this without a dr. referal anyway) Then she said well what are her symptoms. I say well, she cries all day long, especially cries in pain whenever she is about a minute into her feedings. She always appears uncomfortable with jerking her head and making her whole body stiff, gagging, coughing, spit up, won't sleep for longer than 40 minutes, cries in pain on her back. That sort of thing. She says "that is typical". Ok whatever lady, I didn't just walk into the hospital begging to put my baby through an unnecessary procedure. Anyhow, moving on, they then give Lydia 1/4 oz. of Barium. I saw the bottle and that is how much it was, after taking a couple xrays beforehand. Then they took a couple xrays during the feeding, saw the barium enter and immediately start draining. They then waited a minute and a half and that was it. She said no reflux, but that doesn't mean she doesn;t have it, she just doesn't have any at the moment. I am thinking duh, I could have told you that. First of all, she usually begins getting uncomfortable around 1 to 2 ounces when her tummy begins to get full and the reflux begins (a 1/4 oz. in an already empty stomach is not going to show much). She also is at her worst about 15 minutes after eating. I don't think a minute and a half will show anything. But the good news from all this is that the main purpose of the GI scan is to rule out anything that is anatomically wrong (requiring surgery) which she does not have. Yeah. So that is ruled out, which I never thought anything was wrong in that way.

So the next step from here is my dr. will go over the results and call me in the next day or two. Then prevacid is still an option and things like irritable bowel, allergic reactions, etc... are undetectable, just trial and error. But, other good news is, yesterday Lydia had the best day she has had in a long time. So maybe the medicine is starting to work to ease her pain. We will see. Only time will tell.
Thanks for the prayers and comments. And thanks for listening, it is therapeutic as a mommy to type things out, if you know what i mean. I know so many moms have probably dealt with this, I am hearing from some here and there, and it is so helpful to here things that were figured out and helped the baby. Until next time.

Getting some answers!

Well, as I said a couple posts ago, Lydia hates to eat. Always has. For 3 months now she has literally screamed at almost every feeding. She will eat like she is starving sometimes, and then after a few minutes begin screaming, arching her back, her body goes stiff. Well, I thought some of it had passed when she went through a couple weeks with no long crying spells, just crying here and there especially during feedings. So I thought, hey maybe the colic is passing and she is getting better. All the while, the dr. and I were thinking she had issues with gas and that she was "high maintenance and a little picky" with her pickiness over how she liked to be held and only wanting to be held by me, only sleeping for 40 minutes at a time (ever!) and not wanting to eat. So then about 3 weeks ago, the "colic" seemed to come back in full swing especially during the day. She seemed to go back to how she was during month 1 and most of month 2. I began to worry again and research and wonder what it could be. I talked with my mom and I had very similar behavior and had a spastic stomach and reflux. So I had my friend Merrie and Carianne (another time) watch Lydia for a couple hours this week and they both told me Lydia seemed to be in pain from her behavior. So I again got on the phone with the the dr's office. They told me to try soy. That didn't last long, after a day and a half and only eating 3 ounces. I call back, and then was able to talk to the doctor longer this time and he said reflux (my dr. was out recovering from surgery). He said I need to put her on Zantac for infants. I picked it up that day and after 3 days did not see any improvement. Called back to see if the dosage was correct today and my dr. happened to be in the office and told me she was in for a few minutes and to bring Lydia in right away so she could see her. As if on cue, Lydia cried in pain (the way she always does at home) the entire time she was in the office, so it made my claims believable (and not of an uptight mom) and the dr. said she needed to have an upper GI examination done to examine what was going on. She hasn't put on a whole lot of weight, so at this point it is better safe than sorry. So Monday morning we go into the hospital for this test. The dr. said she may have relentless reflux that causes her constant pain. So we will see. I feel so bad for her. She WANTS to be happy, she just can't be right now. I know it is not life threatening, but it is still miserable to see your baby in pain. I have gone back and forth thinking I am crazy. But as my someone told me, I am her only advocate, so if I feel something is wrong with her I have to continue to investigate until I find some answers. With little babies it is so hard to tell in the beginning as you are learning the different cries and behaviors, to know just what is going on. It is a lot of trial and error. So I am hoping we will find some answers and some relief for my sweet little girl. This is a long winded post but if feels good just to type it all out. Please pray for Lydia if you think about it. I am trusting God and knowing that He will enable me to be the best mommy I can be to my little girl.

Oh and an update on me! I found a while back that anemia is part of the problem and am taking care of that. The headaches I am finding as I journal my symptoms are being caused severely only when I am wearing my contacts. So even though my eyes have checked out and my retina buckles are fine, my contacts are still causing the more severe migraines. When I wear my glasses I am not getting them as bad. As for the rest, I am starting to feel a little better, and I am hoping that hormones are the cause for the rest. I didn't get in to see the referred dr. this week. I think I may just be a adjusting back to normal a little slower this time. I have been really paying attention to my diet and have found that I have a little more energy even with not much sleep. Thanks for the comments.

Dressed for Church

3 months old!

Lydia turned 3 months old yesterday. She coos, babbles, and gives a million smiles a day. She has an untameable mohawk, blue eyes that get lighter everyday, long slender fingers, and huge feet that sweat all the time (poor girl). She loves to be held and she is getting close to rolling over. She can't stand tummy time, but she loves to kick non-stop on her play mat. She is so beautiful and I can't believe she is already 3 months old. I am so blessed by our little girl.

Vail trip

We went to Vail from Sunday to Wednesday as Drew worked a conference in Copper. We hung out at the hotel (it had a playground and a pool) which was great. Then when Drew got back in the evening we would go out downtown Vail to eat and play. They had the coolest pirate ship playground. It was nice to not be at home alone with the kiddos again. Drew has traveled so much which I have shared before, and he is trying to cut back or let us come with him. Although he has two trips coming up that we will probably not go on, they are short and spaced out.

Also things are going a little better on this front. Lydia was sleeping through the night, but she recently decided to start waking up twice a night again. So I am really working on getting her full feedings during the day. But she hates to eat and it is hard to get her to eat a lot. She is so cute though. She smiles and coos all the time. I am going to have to get it on video because the girl can talk non-stop. It is hilarious. Luke is doing good. We lost his luvie in the house for 5 whole days and he didn't sleep hardly at all that whole time. But we finally found it in one of Lydia's drawers. Drew and I were literally jumping up and down. With night screaming off and on it was a beautiful sight to see. The POWER that luvie has is amazing. And it has no duplicate anywhere, I have tried everything to find one even though he probably would be able to tell the difference. So Luke is back to sleeping and now hoping Lydia will resume her 10 hour nights shortly. Luke also just cut 2 molars. That was fun and without luvie to comfort him. Yikes.

I am still trying to figure out what is going on with me physically. I am going to the doc again next week and hoping it is something fixable. I am fatigued, dizzy, blackouts, headaches, nauseau. So we will see. Well that is all on this front. Here are some pictures from our trip.


The family.



Best pizza in Vail at Vendettas. yum.